On Belay

Yes.  It really is 3:00 AM.  I haven’t got more then 10 minutes of sleep between 10 and 2 anyway, so I just gave up trying to sleep at all.

 At some point, that nausea I have been feeling for the past two days turned to fear.  I have been forcing it down over the last two days, but it bubbled over tonight.  (Or this morning,…or last night…  I am not really sure.)

 So I came out into the living room and mindlessly opened my computer.  Without knowing it, I found myself on our Church’s website.  This past Sunday, the service was about fear.  My wife and I were not able to attend the service due to our good friend’s daughter’s Christening.  I did however speak to several people who did go to the service, and they all said it was really good.  So at 2:00 this morning, I clicked on the podcast of the service and listened.

 Wow.

 That is about all I can process into words now.

 I can also say that that fear that had been bubbling over just a few hours ago, is gone. 

 If I can spend 4 hours at a time dangling from a steel cable 30 feet in the air, I can do this.

 Let go.  Pray.  Trust.

 And now, go back to sleep.